Home > Personal Empowerment > When Life is Hard

When Life is Hard

4 Oct 2017   Shanti Gowans
Yes, things will appear to go wrong from time to time. Murphy's Law will prevail. However, the greatest gift you can give yourself and others is the gift of unconditional love and acceptance. 
 
Here are some traps to avoid when life is hard,
 
Blame

The first thing people typically do when something goes wrong is to blame. We blame others or ourselves, depending on the situation, however, blaming does no good whatsoever. Do not fall into the blame game.
 
It’s a waste of energy and keeps us focused on the problem, not the solution. Notice when you feel you want to blame or self-judge and come back to how you can solve the problem instead.

Giving up

You may feel like giving up when it feels like the sky is falling in. But what is the alternative? Rather than giving up on the possibility of feeling happy again or on your dreams for the future, let go of your attachment to them. 
 
This means you can go ahead and dream and take the action that can make those dreams into a reality. But, don’t buy into the belief that if they don’t happen, that you won’t be able to be happy, or that it's the end of your world.

Numbing yourself to void the pain

There are many ways people numb ourselves to the pain they feel throughout their lives. Sometimes, we use drugs or alcohol, often, we use keeping incredibly busy or tuning out by watching TV, playing mindless games, or being pre-occupied by social media.
 
Even though it is not fun, it is important to experience the pain that you feel in order to heal. Unless you do that, the pain will stay with you in various forms until you allow yourself to feel it.
 
Isolation

When we are scared, embarrassed or worried, our natural instinct is to hide away to lick our wounds. Of course, there is a time for that, a time when we need to be alone with our feelings and thoughts, but it is too easy to stay in that place of isolation far longer than is healthy. 
 
The less connection you feel to family and friends, the more depressed you become. This almost always increases feelings of fear and worry. 
 
So, make a point to be around the positive, supportive people in your life, even when you don’t feel like it.

Negative people

When you feel really blue, you are more vulnerable than at other times when life seems rosy. Being around people who are always complaining or blaming is a sure way to make yourself feel worse. 
 
Give yourself permission to say ‘no thanks’ to invitations that you know will end up in a huge complaining or back-biting session, and know that it is okay to pull out.
 
Instead, get together with people who are optimistic, and those support their dreams and visions for the future.
 
Meditate
 
You may like to try meditation.  'The Gift of the Present' is a good starter. There are a wide range of practices in my book: 'Handbook for Inner peace' and also guided meditation and visualisation practices in my 4 CD package entitled:  'Calm the MInd, Discover Inner Peace'. Enjoy.

Comments


Add Your Comment

Username
Password  Forgotten your password?
Comment
 

 
 
 
 
 

About Shantiji

Shanti Gowans is the globally recognised author and founder of Shanti Yoga™, Meditation and Ayurveda for the self, family and community.

Shantiji has brought the concepts and practices of a healthy body and a still mind to thousands of Australians through her Yoga and Meditation programs on national television... Read more about Shantiji's biography


India-Nepal Tour

Travel with Shanti & Peter Gowans this November for a trip of a lifetime. 

india tour taj mahal