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Let Go, Let God

9 Apr 2016   Shanti Gowans
Let Go, Let God
Align with what you want yourself, and you will rendevous with it.
Everyone has one common yearning in life: to experience true happiness. Yet, the most significant factor holding us back from achieving this dreams is, simply and sadly, our own selves. We place both intentional and unintentional limitations on ourselves everyday. Life would be so much simpler and more enjoyable if we learned to just release certain limitations. Remember, life can either be something you embrace or something you hide from. Stop making things complicated and just live your life. 
Let’s take a look at some of the things you need to let go of to alleviate these restraints and become a happier person
Approval from others
Remember that we all want different things, and there will always be variety. The more people collectively want something and align with it, the higher the chances that it will manifest and become common, public or standard. However, when what you want seems to be less commonly manifest or available, is because there are less people wanting and aligning with it. Nevertheless, you can always experience what you want to, regardless of what the others are wanting or doing. The majority don’t need to want what you want. 
If you are happy with the choices and decisions you have made, then whose business is that but your own? Who really cares about what other people think? Do you? Think of how much you could achieve if you stopped letting other peoples’ opinions dictate the way you live your life, and engaged in whatever actions you think might better your life.
Anger and Resentment
Anger will eat at you from the inside. Learn how to make peace with those who have wronged you. This isn’t about letting the other person off the hook; it’s about alleviating the pain that resonates within you. Keep in mind that s/he who angers you, controls you.
Negative Body Image
Switch from image to health. There is only one person’s opinion you should be concerned with when it comes to your body and that is you. No one person determines what the “correct” body type is. If you are comfortable in your own skin, and you are healthy, then that should be the only thing that matters. Do not let others tell you that you’re not beautiful because if you believe you are, then you are.
The Myth of a Perfect Partner
The right person for you is a person that you can love with all your heart, who you feel comfortable with and who accepts you for the person you are. The sooner you realise there isn’t one perfect person out there for you, the better off you will be. There is no such thing as a perfect partner, so throw the checklist you ahve concocted in your mind about some perfect image of a partner out the window. S/he is not perfect. You aren’t either, and the two of you will never be perfect. But if s/he can make you laugh at least once, causes you to think twice, and if s/he admits to being human and making mistakes, hold onto them and give them the most you can. S/he isn’t going to quote poetry, nor think about you every moment, but s/he will give you a part of themselvs that s/he knows you could break. Don’t hurt your partner, don’t try to change them, and don’t expect for more than s/he can give. Don’t analyse. Smile when s/he makes you happy, yell when hs/e makes you mad, and miss them when they are not there. Love hard when there is love to be had. Because the perfect person don’t exist, but there’s always one person that is perfect for you. 
The Perfect Life
Just like there is no perfect partner, there is also not a perfect life. Life is what you put into it, so if you are not willing to work hard and put forth effort, you will most likely end up miserable. The choices you make will directly reflect the life you lead. It is up to you to create the best possible world for yourself.
Money as your sole motivator
Too many people live their lives with the thought that they will be millionaires. While this can be a realistic goal for some, it is not something that can be achieved without hard work and dedication. Examine your reason for effort. Stop letting money be your sole motivator; find a career you are passionate about and immerse yourself in it completely.
A sense of entitlement
You need to go out into the world and actively look for fulfillment. You cannot take a backseat in life and expect things to happen for you, and that good fortune will arrive at your doorstep. Appreciate the life you live, and be grateful for what you have. Value each minute of every day. Live like there’s no tomorrow, and make the most out of any situation.
Make no time for excuses. You want to medditate, but you don’t have the time? Wake up early and sit! Excuses are only rationalisations that make you feel better about yourself for not doing something you want or need to be doing. You desire results? Stop comlaining, and start doing.
Early conditioningWhilst you may not remember everything that happened to you before you were 6 years old, science has proven that your subconscious mind does. Every cartoon character, every song on the radio, every conversation you overheard your parents having during that time soaked into your mind like water into a sponge, and became a collection of dormant beliefs that have profoundly (yet silently) impacted your ability to live your life ever since. And the truth is if you sometimes feel as if you are your own worst enemy, if you are in debt, or facing a financial or career challenge right now, whenever you find it easy or difficult to manifest the success, health and wealth you want - these early, conditionings are the reason. The big question is to know what exact beliefs are implanted in you, and how exactly they block your life. 
Thoughts of people from the past
This person is your ex for a reason. If you are going to think of him or her at all, try and think only about the lessons the experience taught you. Do not linger on any old feelings, as this will only prevent you from being happy with someone else in the present  and/or the future.
Whilst it is sometimes difficult to admit, occassionally, you can be just wrong. Other people have just as much capability as you do in providing the correct solution, so stop being stubborn and just embrace this. The less stubborn you act, the more open you are to learning new things. Think of all you could be exposed to if you welcomed opinions other than your own.
Live in the present, and get your stuff done when it needs to be done. Stop thinking you will finally get to whatever task is at hand tomorrow. Maximise your time to the best of your ability. Complete each task you need to as soon as you can. This allows you to feel free from worry and stress by getting things out of the way as soon as possible. You also allow yourself more free time to enjoy the things you love.
Your Baggage
We have all been hurt one time or another by someone we loved, or we thought we loved. Carrying negative feelings into future relationships will only prove to be disastrous. No two people are the same, so it’s unfair to hold a present or future relationship to a standard set by the past. Begin each new encounter and relationship with a clean slate.
What you put out into the universe will come back to you. To change the way you think, you choose to see life as a glass half empty or half full. You have so much to be grateful for. Take a moment now to appreciate it. Anything is possible in the mind of a positive thinker.
Condemnation and Judgmental Thoughts
Why feel the need to constantly worry about what is going on in other people’s lives? If we spent as much time reflecting and choosing our own responses and behaviours as we do worrying about those of others, our lives would be a whole lot more meaningful. As we don’t have too much understanding about what is going on in another person’s life, so passing judgment on the way they act is unbecoming.
Happiness does not lie in having what you want, but in being gratedful for what you have. Stop envying others and learn to appreciate what you have. Everyone’s life is unique. You have certain things to offer that others cannot. To act in a jealous manner, is to bring negative feelings into our lives. There is absolutely nothing to gain from behaving this way.
Happy people tend to have extremely high levels of self-esteem. They accept who they are and work it everyday of their lives. They radiate confidence, flaunt their pride and give off positive vibes. There is no reason to be insecure in life. If there are things you are self-conscious about, go out into the world and seek to change them. Only you have the ability to create the best version of yourself.
Depending on others for you happiness
At the end of the day, the only person you can count on 100 percent of the time is yourself. Do not make the unfortunate mistake many people do and put your happiness in the hands of others. A relationship is not going to fulfill the void if you can’t make yourself happy. You need to achieve happiness on your own before you can find someone else to share it with. This creates a detrimental dependency that will prevent you from becoming self-sufficient.
The Past
Put an end to living in the past. There is virtually nothing to gain by wallowing in mistakes you have previously made. Take past mistakes as lessons learned, and move forward. You cannot wholeheartedly move on to a better future if you are constantly looking behind you. Things happened, and that’s that. Move on.
The need for control
Sometimes you just need to let life happen the way it is meant to. You cannot spend your life stressing about things that are outside of your control. Try to relax, and let things play out naturally. Embrace the unknown, as this is where you will be surprised the most. Let yourself be whisked into unforeseen endeavors, and relish in the excitement they bring.
Managing your expectations is the key to happiness. If you let go of expectations, you will never be disappointed. Often, we tend to believe that the way we treat others will be the way we are treated in return. Unfortunately, this does not always happen. Do not expect a certain result from any given situations. Go into an experience with an open mind. This will allow you to fully immerse yourself, without the pressure of living up to preconceived notions.
Offer no resistance to what you do not want
Success is the ability to go from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm. That is how you continue feeding positive energy towards your desire while detaching until it manifests. The secret of those who are able to keep persisting at what they want is their lack of resistance towards what they don’t want. They are able to face a “No” time after time, until they get a “Yes”. They have learnt not to resist the “Nos” and allowed themselves to get through as many “Nos” as necessary until meet a “Yes”.
Be grateful
The more you practice feeling and expressing gratitude, the more your brain adapts to and is strengthened with this mindset.
Practicing gratitude seems to set up a healthful, self-perpetuating cycle in your brain: counting your blessing now makes it easier to notice and count them later. And the more good you see in your life, the happier and more successful you're likely to be.
Be at rest and all your desires will manifest in due time
When you are not resisting, you relax. When you resist, you struggle, worry and stress. Relax and allow the stream to carry you, no matter where it goes. Do not resist when it turns you from the direction you do not wish to go. Understand that regardless how it twist and turns, it will eventually bring you to where you desire to end up. So the less you resist and the more you allow yourself to go with the flow, the freer your journey will be.


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About Shantiji

Shanti Gowans is the globally recognised author and founder of Shanti Yoga™, Meditation and Ayurveda for the self, family and community.

Shantiji has brought the concepts and practices of a healthy body and a still mind to thousands of Australians through her Yoga and Meditation programs on national television... Read more about Shantiji's biography

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