A Peak into a Shanti Yoga Class
March 27, 2025
Dearest empath brothers and sisters,
I wanted to share some reflections on the subtle yet important distinction between being aware of the world around us and allowing it to profoundly affect us. As individuals who feel things deeply, it can be easy to blur these lines.
Let's remember these guiding principles: observe but don’t absorb, love but don’t depend, want but don’t need, feel but don’t dwell.
Consider this: cold water can feel warm when your hands are freezing, and everything tastes delicious when you're truly hungry. Similarly, in life, even small acts of kindness can feel significant, especially after experiencing little or nothing. However, it's important to remember that just because something feels good or sufficient doesn't automatically mean it is. Take the time to reflect and consider if what you are receiving truly aligns with what you desire and deserve, and if it is genuinely good for you. Not everyone has your best interests at heart, even if their actions appear kind on the surface.
As empaths, it's natural to care deeply and take on the emotions of others. You often step in to help even when not explicitly asked, because that’s part of who you are. The challenge arises when you start to believe that other people’s problems are yours to solve or that you need their approval to feel validated. It’s tempting to absorb all the surrounding emotions and energy, thinking that by carrying enough, you can somehow fix everything. But in doing so, you risk losing sight of where your own needs end and others' begin.
This is a reminder to all of us: observe, but don’t absorb. Observation involves being aware and understanding without letting external factors profoundly affect your inner state. You can love someone deeply without your happiness or self-worth becoming entirely dependent on their presence in your life. Appreciate them for who they are, without allowing their absence to leave you feeling empty.
It’s perfectly okay to want things, such as connection, dreams, a fulfilling future. But know that you are complete within yourself, regardless of whether those desires are immediately fulfilled. There is so much positivity to be found in life if we take the time to see it.
And yes, please continue to feel deeply. Embrace the full spectrum of emotions. However, try not to dwell excessively on any one feeling. Life will inevitably bring both joyful and sorrowful moments that touch your heart. Lingering too long in sadness can weigh us down. Give yourself permission to acknowledge pain without letting it define you, just as you must fully enjoy happiness without constantly fearing its end.
Ultimately, the art of observing without absorbing is about balance. It’s about honouring your empathy while preventing it from overwhelming you. It’s about recognising that you deserve more than the bare minimum, no matter how long you might have gone without. Just because you’ve been longing for kindness doesn’t mean you should rationalise unkindness.
Your energy is precious and you are sacred. Just because you have an incredibly big heart, you are not required to carry the burdens of everyone around you. It’s perfectly acceptable and necessary to set boundaries, both with others and with yourself. Know when to step back, not to take things personally, own your personal space, and let go.
As you navigate life, strive to observe without internalising everything, to love without clinging too tightly, and to keep moving forward while staying true to your own essence. You deserve to live fully. Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain.
